Its been five days now and it all still seems so unreal. The fact that I will never see your beautiful face again, I simply cannot comprehend.

Although I my heart was hurting because I knew you couldn't be the man that I needed my love for you never lessened as the days passed us by. Had I only known Gods plan I would have held on to you longer..hell, I probably would have never let you go. I prayed many times for you to realize you couldn't live another day without me in your life. But that day never came before your time ran out.  There is no understanding that I can find as to why God would choose to take you; so young & full of life.

You were a light in this dark world. Like a magnet you drew everyone in who met you. In my heart your memory has permanently found a home. All I can find comfort in is my faith that I will one day see you again. I am struggling immensely with the regret of where we left off, but I believe that you knew the love I felt for you. I'll be with you forever in that beautiful sunrise...frozen in time.

Until we meet again my dear Gonzo, I will carry you with me. Amor Fati.